We put summer to bed, tucked it in, walked downstairs and found the dark days of fall waiting for us. Traditionally, studios have reserved the fall season for middle of the road fair that ultimately is discovered to be just below average. Top 10 October and November openings of all time include titles such as The Grudge, Saw III and High School Musical 3. The past few years November has been lucky enough to host a Twilight picture or another Harry Potter installment. December is typically your opportunity to catch future Oscar Nominees, long awaited sequels, holiday comedies and animated critical darlings. I am here to tell you . . . the future is bleak. As we approach what will likely be a box office record setting 2012, it appears we are being given an opportunity to save our money and skip 90%-95% of releases over the next three months. And I am not happy about it . . .
October 7 (Friday)
The Ides of March – Likely another good Clooney political thriller no one will pay to see.
Real Steel – The marketing campaign has gone from Transformers-like action film to a picture directed at boys ages 10-15. Over-promoted and DVD material . . .
October 14 (Friday)
The Big Year – Steve Martin, Jack Black and Owen Wilson . . . in October? Sounds to me like the bird-watching comedy disappointed the higher-ups.
Footloose – The remake/update still follows the premise that dancing is outlawed in a town . . . come on.
The Thing – Decent looking horror click, but it’s just not enough to have you counting down the days until the release.
Father of Invention – Kevin Spacey flick that already has a DVD release date.
Fireflies in the Garden – Julia Roberts/Ryan Reynolds movie filmed in 2008! Yeah, I am sure it is good . . .
The Skin I Live In – Weird Antonio Banderes flick . . . you won’t see it . . .
Trespass – Nicolas Cage flick (yes another one) that already has a DVD release date.
October 21 (Friday)
Paranormal Activity 3 – What a coincidence . . . They make a crap load of money and they are crap.
The Three Musketeers – Absolutely no buzz on the reboot . . . it looks ridiculous . . . By the way, it is by the same guy who basically runs the “Resident Evil” franchise.
Being Elmo: A Puppeteer’s Journey – A decent look documentary . . . that won’t be playing at a theater near you.
October 28 (Friday)
Anonymous – Twist on the life of Shakespeare . . . yeah – that sounds like a hit.
In Time – The Timberlake thriller appears to have a nice original premise, could be the diamond in the rough.
Johnny English Reborn – I don’t know what to say here . . .
The Rum Diary – Johnny Depp flick looks good . . . probably the one to see in October.
The Double – Will be on DVD before 2011 is over.
November 4 (Friday)
Puss in Boots – I liked Puss in Boots in the Shrek movies, but not enough to spend $10.00.
Tower Heist – So much hope for this one, but the trailer is one of worst of 2011.
A Very Harold & Kumar Christmas – A fan of the franchise, but I don’t think you pay $10.00 (probably more for 3D) to see it.
November 11 (Friday)
11-11-11 – One of those mysterious movies that will bomb. It didn’t work for Apollo 18.
Immortals – 300 that is claiming to be different than 300. Someone forgot to tell the guy who made the trailer.
J. Edgar – The Clint Eastwood directed film is must see this fall/winter. It will be up for best picture.
Jack and Jill – Adam Sandler playing both roles . . . annnnnd I’m annoyed.
November 18 (Friday)
Happy Feet Two – Another 3D flick that will cost a family $50.00 to see.
The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn – Part 1 – No thanks.
The Descendants – George Clooney could be the favorite for best actor right now in this one. Hopefully, this one gets a wide release.
November 23 (Wednesday – Thanksgiving)
Arthur Christmas – More 3D, more money.
Hugo – Martin Scorsese’s first venture into kids fare . . . might be worth checking out, but not what his core audience wants. What did you say about the DeNiro/Pecsi reunion?
The Muppets – The movie parents should be taking their kids to see. No 3-D, no extra charge.
Piranha 3DD – 3D sequel even though the first was not a hit . . . at all. I hope this bombs . . . badly.
The Artist – Silent film that was the darling of Cannes. This might not find its audience until next year.
A Dangerous Method – Probably a good movie, but I just don’t see myself watching the relationship between Carl Jung and Sigmund Freud giving birth to psychoanalysis. Wait . . . I just fell asleep writing that . . .
December 9 (Friday)
New Year’s Eve – The sequel to the terrible Valentine’s Day. Proof audiences don’t care about good movies.
The Sitter – Adventures in Babysitting with an R rating and Jonah Hill.
Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy – Looks good, but early word is that it’s confusing.
December 16 (Friday)
Alvin and the Chipmunks: Chip-Wrecked – The third installment in the highly profitable franchise. There is nothing we can do about it . . .
Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows – The sequel represents on of the few event pictures towards the end of the year. The first one did well, but was it good enough to bring people back?
The Iron Lady – Meryl Streep’s annual Oscar role . . . annoying.
December 21 (Wednesday)
December 23 (Friday)
December 25 (Sunday – Christmas Day)
The Darkest Hour – Alien invasion movie . . . didn’t the performance Battle L.A. and Skyline send the message to the studio we are sick of Alien invasion movies.
Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close – Tom Hanks, Sandra Bullock, heavy drama . . . Merry Christmas!
December 28 (Wednesday)
War Horse – New Spielberg movie about a horse in the war. Wait . . . what is it about?